Duuude. Today I went through some pictures of Bella’s birthday party back in mid January. I stumbled across this picture. Duuude. My rumpus looked like it swallowed a small child. Just. Not. Right. (also note arms, love handles, roll under the bra strap. Wowza.)
So I decided to put on the same jeans (maybe also because I only have 2 pair) and take another picture of my backside after 2 months of exercise…
Thanks goodness for treadmills. Thank goodness for a little bit of determination. Thank you, Steph, for getting off your rumpus! Time for some new jeans. Size 8. Yayyy!
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And I got this fun idea of putting my weight on a tank top from the Tyra Banks show. Her whole audience wore shirts with their weight on it, all shapes and sizes of beautiful women. I took this picture a week ago and now? 141! I just can’t believe I only have 6 pounds to go! I didn’t change my diet at all, just walked/ran 2.5 miles three days a week with some light weight lifting for 20 minutes three times a week. And as much as I always hated exercise, I am addicted now. I think it is good for my body and my soul. Thanks, Tyra, for the fun idea!
I’ve thought a bit about Annika’s post recently. Basically I think she was frustrated that people treat children, and families with children, like second class citizens sometimes. She talked about how some restaurants don’t welcome the presence of children and how, in general, so many people treat children as if they aren’t significant. I simply agree. And I just have dealt with that by not spending my money in places that don’t welcome, even cater, to families with children. I also agree that there are places that perhaps babies and children don’t “belong” because they just aren’t “child friendly”, and sometimes I’ve learned where those places are the hard way.
When I was a single mother, lonely, and very much on my own, I recall waiting excitedly for The Scarlet Letter to be released in theaters. I knew no one, so I planned to go alone with my 3 month old Austin. When it finally released, I took Austin to the movie. Of course he had been to the movies before. He was always very pleasant and slept all the way through the movie. It was a true treat for me to see this movie (who knows why, it turned out to be an awful flick). This time, he didn’t sleep. He squirmed and grunted (but wasn’t loud) for all of maybe 2-3 minutes before someone complained and I was asked to leave. Within the first 15 minutes of the movie! No reimbursement. I left the theater with my jaw dragging the floor. I couldn’t believe some crotchity old person couldn’t even give me a moment to quiet Austin or that the theater couldn’t give a young mother her money back. I left in my car with an untouched $5 bag of popcorn, an infant who was sound asleep, and tears welling in my eyes. I totally understand others wanting a quiet theater, they paid for their tickets too. But it just seems like I could have been treated with more kindness and patience. Maybe they could have given me my money back, or even given me a moment to get Austin to sleep and then allow me to enter the theater again. I was young, but I wasn’t trying to be innapropriate or rude.
So one of the things that I got from Annika’s post is that people are sometimes unkind and judgemental of parents and children. They are impatient and even sometimes rude to parents trying to cope with their children. I’m guilty! I have seen mothers give in to their toddlers “to keep them quiet” and have judged her for it. Rolled my eyes. Thought her to be a push-over who didn’t discipline. But why? It was none of my business. It didn’t effect me one way or another. It simply wasn’t my place to judge her, much less let her know I was judging her. How ugly of me!
After I had Noah I immediately got smacked upside the head with depression. I didn’t talk about it to anyone but Jeremy. I cried a lot. I was tired and frustrated and wanted to give up. I couldn’t take antidepressants because I wanted to nurse Noah. I knew not nursing my last baby would only make my depression worse. So I talked to my doctor a lot and he suggested I get out with my family, get fresh air, get exercise. He knew Noah was on oxygen and was very, very tiny but he suggested we go for walks with him. So, one Saturday morning, I packed my toddler and my 4 pound baby with his oxygen tank into the stroller and went for a nice walk. Along the way I noticed my neighbors having yard sales. I LOVE yard sales. Yard Sales are my very favorite summertime activity! So I stopped and looked at some of the goodies. I bought a suitcase, a small dollhouse, and some beanie babies at my first 2 stops. My last stop had a dark skinned baby doll that Bella fell in love with. I went up to the lady to pay for the doll. She immediately threw in her two cents about how my baby was “OBVIOUSLY” premature and that “OBVIOUSLY” I shouldn’t have him outside the house. I felt the heat rise up on my neck. But I passively told her that the doctor told me it was OK and that my windows in my house are open letting him breath the same air that is outside anyways. “I’ve got him covered up too so that the sun doesn’t bother him.” I was DEFENDING myself to some Bitch who should have simply minded her own business. I went home feeling crappier than I already did.
The next day I heard her 12 year old son screaming curse words at her. A week later I saw her 9 year old screaming and hanging on to the bumper of her car as she yanked and pulled at him trying to get him to go into the house. I hear them yelling in their home all the time. And guess what? I JUDGE HER! And I feel OK about it too. Maybe she should have given her children fresh air and pleasant walks when they were babies. Maybe she should just mind her own business. Maybe I should too.
Now I don’t know why Annika’s post made me reflect on these things but I have decided that I need to work on not judging others. That surely will bring me the same respect from others in a karma type way.
Guess what!? I gave in to Bella in a grocery aisle once. She wanted m&m’s and threw a wild, crazy temper tantrum for them. But I was tired and I was doing the best I could in that moment and the best I had was to give her the darn candy. Yep, I caved in. I admit it. And? I got dirty looks for it.
I think I need to just remember to be nice to the mommies. Judging others doesn’t make me feel better. It makes me feel yucky. Almost as yucky as when others judge me…
Today was another dream day. I took pictures all day because it was THAT good!
We started the day off by taking the little ones to the Recreation Center for swimming and sliding! Bella couldn’t get enough of the water slide, she made Jeremy take her up and down ten zillion times. Good thing he’s so fit because it’s quite a hike to the top!
We then went to one of my favorite brewery restaurants. I had a delicious mixed drink and Jeremy had a beer. I ate the most fried and greasy thing on the menu– Fish & Chips. Yummy! I was celebrating my accomplishment in the weight loss department– I’m down to 140! I’ve lost 12-13 pounds in 2 months and I’m so happy I celebrated with food all day! Here’s Bella eating my Lime and here’s her getting mad at me for suggesting the idea. What!? Limes are good! And so are pickles. Just ask Noah! He made out quietly with that pickle for an entire hour in his carseat. I’m not kidding! Annika, here’s how ya keep those darn youngin’s quiet when you go to a restaurant, for all of the crotchity grumps who want to just have all kids be seen and not heard. Give them a pickle. But not the lime. The lime makes them loud and crazy.
We took a cozy, warm nap together after lunch. Have I told you how much I love my family? Oh, how I love them. We fit together perfectly. We even snooze together like soul mates.
When we woke, we went straight to the park for some more of the healing and wonderful sunshine! Bella showed her big brother a thing (a video, but worth seeing!)or two about being tough on the park toys! She also threw a fantastic and theatrical temper tantrum, which I caught on camera while she was on the swing. I wonder if she knows she’s beautiful even when she’s mad? She must know.
Then it was dinner time. But did we do the responsible thing and take our children home for a nutritious meal? Heck no! ICE CREAMMMMM! Yep, at 5:30 p.m., we had ice cream.
The bottom of the cone is my very favorite part of the ice cream treat. It is one of my very favorite things to eat in the world. And I realized today how absolutely in love I must be with my babies, because I gave the whole bottom to them. Every last dripping, sweet, crunchy bite. Yes. I am in love.
When we said prayers tonite with Bella, I thanked God for our lovely day together, for our delicious meals, for our healthy family, for the bottom of ice cream cones, and for giving us a beautiful life together. After I said the prayer, Bella asked me to talk to God again. She wanted me to say the same things over, in exactly the same way. She must understand more than I thought. She must have wanted me to say it twice– once for me, once for her.
Thank you, God. You have blessed my life with an abundance of love! We think you are wonderful!
Today was a beautiful day. The sun was bright and warm and Bella, Noah, and I spent the day basking in her glorious warmth. We had a wonderful picnic at the park complete with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, bananas, applesauce, and grape juice. Delicious. Babies with peanut butter cheeks are delicious too. Chomp.
We played at the park after we ate. I heard Bella laugh like I’ve never heard. I’m going to have to capture that on video next time we go. She’s beautiful. The babes took a nice, long 2 hour nap leaving mom all the time she needed to catch up on laundry and to cruise blogs. Could I have molded a more wonderful day with my own two hands? Maybe just one minor change: The only thing we missed was the company of Jeremy and Austin. But they joined us for another trip to the park just before dinner. I think the spring weather is doing good things for the soul. It was a whopping 69 degrees today! I’m in the mood to put my hands in some dirt and plant flowers. But, alas, I must be patient. There will be a few more snows before June.
During the babe’s nap, I had a chance to take pictures for the Self Portrait Challenge. I’m feeling self conscious now that SyngSyng pointed out that I only do it so that people will tell me I’m pretty. I don’t take compliments well at all, never have. So for someone to say that I am doing the self portrait challenge for vanity purposes makes me feel weird. I’ll get over that, because I enjoy doing this. I think it’s fun to see people like Yvonne struttin’ her bad self in her self portraits. She’s beautiful and I’m her bloggy fan. Oh yes, I have a bloggy crush on her. But I also have a crush on you. Does that make me a Tramp? Just don’t tell Jeremy, k?
So here’s this weeks photo using Flickr’s mosaic tool. You should try some of the tools, they are fun!
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