T-R-O-U-B-L-E
Someone? Please? Say a prayer for my tweenager. He is neck deep in some trouble when he gets home…
Let me start by saying, he’s doing chores until he is 18 years old. Period.
Austin is God’s Gift as far as kids go. I’m not just partial, he is that good. Which is the only thing that is going to save him from the Wrath Of Mommy when he gets home after school today. Here’s why:
I’m washing the dishes this morning while I’m baking some snacks for his football team. They are having a end of season party tonight and I made Austin’s favorite: Sausage cheese balls. Suddenly, the phone rings. “Unavailable number” comes up on the screen of my cell phone. Normally I don’t answer these calls because they are telemarketers and, well, why waste my minutes telling them to go piss up a rope? This time, I answered.
“Hi, Mrs. Stepherz, my name is Alex and I am a representative with Alltel. I’m sorry to disturb your morning but it has come to our attention that there is some unusual activity on your account coming from the number ‘555-5555′ (Austin’s number).”
“Yeah, well what kind of unusual activity?”
“Your account is showing extreme usage in text messages, and I understand that you purchased a large text plan for this phone, but the phone is exceeding this package.”
“Ok, what are you saying?”
“Well, in the last 4 weeks, this number has had nearly 4000 text messages for one phone and your package only covers 1000 per phone.”
“And?”
“Bottom line is that your bill is going to reflect this, 20 cents per message beyond that 1000 that is covered. Your bill normally runs you $125 per month. Next month your bill will be $626. That is after we made some generous adjustments because we value your business and want to help you out”
“FLIIPIN-FUGETY-FARGIN-FUCK!”
I called Alltel’s customer service a few minutes later, after I had some time to breath, and begged them to help me out. I begged them to make some kind of further adjustment. They offered me $30 off of the bill, but that’s all they could do. I’m signed into this contract for another 6 months, or I’d leave and try Verizon!
I just bought Austin this phone a little over a month ago because, “eeeghh. I’m cool like that. eeggghh”. I told him I would buy the text package that allowed him 1000 text messages if he didn’t mind me taking it off his allowance. He agreed. Furthermore, I explained to him that he needed to be responsible and keep his messaging below 1000 (which I thought was very reasonable!).
I am absolutely floored. I have to pay the full amount by the end of the first week in December. Perfect timing, huh? Imagine what this ordeal is going to do to Christmas. I don’t normally spend more than $600 on the whole family for Christmas presents, much less $600 on one brat’s child’s cell phone bill! What’s worse is that this is the first Christmas that we don’t have 2 incomes, putting even more of a burden on making that $600 for presents. It’s really unfortunate that the whole family is going to have to make sacrifices because of this. But it is inevitable, because we are on a very fixed income. Not even my paid blogging can help this situation.
And I’m not blaming Austin completely. No, I’m mad and all. But he’s a kid, and I’m the adult. I should have known better. I was a fool for assuming he could handle the responsibility. Foolish, foolish Momma. What was I thinking? I would have never thought that this child could send and receive more than 100 text messages a day! I mean, doesn’t he go to school or something? Seriously, how does he spend 8 hours in school and still have time to send and receive over 100 text messages a day, y’all!? WTF? WHAT THE FUCK? Sorry. I had to do that. Therapy. Breathing helps. Cursing cures.
Anyways… I just asked him a few weeks ago if he was staying below his 1000, and he promised he was. I asked him how he knew and he said, “I keep count, my cell phone tells me. I don’t get or receive more than 20 or 30 a day.”
Yeah, right.
Ugghhhhh. Gosh, can I get a vacation now? Have I earned one yet?
Also, does anyone want a cell phone? Austin’s is available to the highest bidder…
My brother was the same way with text messages. Does your company not offer unlimited texts?
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