A Lovely Encounter

I asked you for suggestions on topics to write about, and I promise to get to “The Love Story”, but I wanted to share with you a very neat, memorable, special encounter I had yesterday. I know it’s long, but I think it’s worth reading…

I took the kids into town for a play date with my friend Amy at a new park the City just built. It was a perfect day– not a cloud in the sky, a nice summer breeze, happy smiling babies. When I pulled up to the park, I noticed there was a conservation group of all young teenagers doing some final landscaping on the park. They were all about 13 or 14, and there was about 15 of them. I immediately thought, “Oh, gosh. Let’s try to find another park. I don’t want to deal with trying to keep the babies out of their way.” But we stayed, and I’m so glad we did…

About 2 hours into our stay at the new park, Bella got a splinter in her foot. I don’t have fingernails, so I was trying to pull this tiny splinter with my stubby nails and it just wasn’t working. I sent Austin to my truck to see if there were tweezers in my glove box. He came back a few moments later and I yanked the splinter. After it was out, I cuddled with Bella, soothed her, kissed her. I suddenly felt someone watching me. I looked over my shoulder and saw a conservation youth, on her lunch break, watching my interactions with Bella. She was smiling, and seemingly in a bit of admiration. I smiled back at her and carried Bella over to another part of the park to join her friends. It was a neat moment all by itself.

The girl immediately reminded me of myself at 14. She was tall and gangly, thin and awkward. She had braces and short curly hair. But besides having a familiar look about her, she was like me in her curiosity. Most 13/14 year olds are self absorbed and a bit on the shallow side. They aren’t interested in observing the sweet interactions between a mother and her child. But I was that way. Probably because I missed my mom and liked being reminded of our closeness by watching other mothers and daughters together. While my friends could see right through a family playing together, I was always the one who stopped to watch them.

A few minuted later, the group of youth started convening again after their lunch break. Amy’s little fella and Noah made their way to a mound of dirt a few feet away from the teens and began digging in the dirt and pulling up colorful little flags that the landscaping company (a seperate entity than the conservationists) had put down. I read the flags to make sure they didn’t say “Stay Off” or “Pesticides” or anything. They were basically little flags with the landscaping company’s business card printed on them. So, I didn’t make Noah quit playing in the dirt or pulling flags. I intended to let him play and then I would stick the flags back in the dirt when he was done.

I was talking to Amy while we watched the boys play, when suddenly I heard some teenagers from the group teasing us. They were saying rude things and being really nasty. They were joking about how the flags were there to tell the public to stay off the mound of dirt because of “landmines”, but since Amy and I were such half-assed mothers we were going to sit there and watch our toddler sons blow up. Ha, ha, ha! Such young, witty, funny kids. They kept teasing while Amy and I kept our backs to them and tried to ignore it. Finally one of the kids came and yanked a flag out of Noah’s hand and stuck it back in the dirt. He walked away looking at us like I’ve never been looked at. He stopped next to his friends, folded his arms, and glared at us like a madman. Amy and I started dusting our babes off and sticking the stupid flags back into the ground when I heard them teasing some more. I decided someone needed to be set in their place because they were being completely innappropriate. I turned around and saw ONE person looking back– the sweet little girl. I wanted them all to hear me, but I kind of directed my scolding at her because she was the only one looking at me. I assumed the nasty comments were coming from her because, with my back turned, it seemed to be coming from where she was sitting. I should have known better. I should have just ignored it instead of acting out of emotion or anger…

“Do you have something you want to say to me?”

“No.”

“Do you have a problem with me or my children?”

“Oh. No.”

“If you have something you want to say, feel free.”

“Uh. I’m sorry. No. I don’t.”

I walked away with a scolding, indifferent look on my face. The smile left her face in the first milliseconds of my engagement with her. And within a few moments of walking away after the encounter, my heart felt so heavy I could hardly stand it. I immediately knew I had scorned the wrong child, and I felt HORRIBLE. I pouted for a few moments. Amy comforted me about it. Finally I decided to walk right up to that little girl and…

“Sweetie? I wanted to, um, just come talk to you about what just happened. I wanted to apologize to you for what I said, because it was wrong. You see, I thought you were one of the kids being nasty to us. After I said it, I realized it wasn’t you by your reaction and the look on your face. I’m so sorry. You know, grown-ups are learning and growing every day too.”

“It’s OK, don’t worry about it. I was going to come talk to you too. Because. I just wanted you to know. I wasn’t part of that group being mean. And. I wanted to just tell you that. Umm. I just was telling my friend how beautiful you are, and your daughter too.”

Oh. Ohhhhhh. Be still, my heart! I started crying, I hugged her. And, I will forever, FOREVER remember this lovely encounter with a sweet little girl who changed me. She did. She stopped me in my fast little tracks and told me so much more than she said with words. She taught me that my energy and my words can change the fate of someone’s day. As bad as I could have made her day by being mean, I could also have made her heart smile like she did mine. We have the power to change a person’s day, or in her case, so much more than just one day.

She also taught me that beautiful souls float into, and back out of our days. We never know who they are. They come in so many shapes, sizes, ages. Treat them all with care, and love, and kindness.

Posted by: stepherz | 06-04-2008 | 10:06 PM
Posted in: Just Me