Welp, my computer is working again. I’ll tell you more about that later. And I tried to picture myself as a non-blogger for the past few days, but it ain’t gonna happen. Well, if my computer was broken it might have happened. But it’s not. So, anyways… I’m back! And I promised a love story SEVERAL months ago, so I’ll get back on the blogging buggy the right way! My friend Martha won’t let me forget my promise!

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Bad news is that I found myself spotting tonight. I’m not going to read into anything and I’m hoping it’s just a fluke. Fingers crossed that all is well! I can’t imagine anything but getting to see my healthy little “Sticker” on Friday’s ultrasound, swimming around with his healthy little heart fluttering away…

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And now… The Love Story…

circa 1998 

It was January 1997. I was a lonely single mother living in the slummy part (now the historical part) of Asheville when I met Jeremy. I had a few little affairs in the years after I moved away from home, but none of them serious or long lasting. I met Dave, an owner of a home remodeling company that was restoring a historical home a few doors down, right before I met Jeremy. He was a bit older and had 2 little girls. I wanted to date someone who was older than I because I wanted flowers, dates, gifts, doting and the boys my age weren’t doin’ it for me. Turns out Dave wasn’t very good for that either, so it didn’t last long. He had a young carpenter that worked for him, named Jeremy, that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of. He was so totally “my type”– muscley, screaming sex appeal, funny, witty, smart, strong. But, at that point I wasn’t interested in settling down and marrying anyone. I didn’t have a plan to have an amazing husband, a mini-van (or Gas Guzzling Expedition), 4 kids and a mortgage. I just wanted a Luvah. I think that’s just because I thought that’s all I could get. Silly Girl. But perhaps love comes when you quit trying so hard to find it…

Anyways, I loved watching him drive up and down my street in his sexy little Jeep– top down, shirt off, pumping Nine Inch Nails on his tape player (were CDs even round way back then?). I always sat on the stoop of my apartment watching him work on the old house. One day my car battery had died and I was about in tears because I was late for work. I had the hood up on my car, trying to figure out how I was going to get the car out of parallel parking so that I could jump start it on the hill. Suddenly Jeremy pulled up in his Jeep. He jumped out and said hello. Before I could wipe the drool off my chin, he had his jumper cables out and was hooking them to my battery. Just then, Dave drove up the road. Jeremy didn’t want to invade Dave’s “territory” so he jumped my car and was gone before I could even give him my flirtatious thank you smile. I was so bummed! Dangit Dave! Terrible timing. Dave and I weren’t an item anymore, but Jeremy didn’t want to step on Dave’s toes, I guess.

A few weeks later a friend of mine and I were sitting outside on my porch and I was watching Jeremy. She said, “Ok. That’s it. I’m going to go talk to him for you. You obviously aren’t brave enough to do it for yourself.” And off she galloped, up the street. I know I turned 14 shades of red watching her talk to him. I imagined the conversation… “Hi Jeremy. My name is Heather. I know this sounds silly, but my friend Stephanie thinks you’re cute…” Ohhhh. How elementary school! Within a few days, Jeremy and I were having our first date… And I was completely love struck after that!

Jeremy would do these amazing things… like out of a love movie. On our first date (to see Johnny McGuire, no less) he opened doors for me… He held my hand… He was such a perfect gentleman. And the way he would watch me, like I was a Goddess– it just melted me.

On the way home after the movie, we got stopped at a light. He jumped out of his Jeep, ran to the side of the road, and picked an armful of wildflowers for me. He jumped back in the Jeep and handed them to me… Kissed me so sweetly (no man ever kissed me like he did)… the cars waiting at the light behind us were hooting and cheering at him! He was such a thoughtful, patient, nurturing, and affectionate man. I thought it was entirely too good to be true, but it wasn’t at all. It is true, and he is STILL the beautiful, amazing, loving and romantic man he was then.

He was so honest and real. He was oozing with affection and complete attention. It took him no time to figure out when I needed something… A cuddle, a nice quiet dinner, a massage, a tylenol, a compliment, a whatever. He was always so attentive. But no one had ever been as depthful with me as he was. I guess I never knew how close a human being could be to another human being in this way. Sure, I loved my son with all my heart and soul– Austin and I were like peas and carrots. But to have a partner, a companion in life– it was just what I needed.

Within a few months of dating, he proclaimed his love for me and my sweet little Austin (who ADORED him). And I knew, from the depths of my being, that he was the only man I’d ever love again (besides my sons, of course). We moved in together right away, and it was perfect. Perfect. Austin had a consistent father figure whose every decision was based on what was best for our family, and I got to live with my very best friend!

We got married in November of 2000, and had a quick, humble, sweet wedding. We had already been together, living like husband and wife for 3+ years, so a fancy wedding wasn’t necessary (or possible on our budget). We spent our anniversary in Charleston, and moved to Colorado within a week of getting married. We’ve grown so much in ourselves, and as a family since we’ve been here.

I wasn’t close to my father, so it seemed especially appropriate for Austin to give me away at our wedding. He was the sweetest thing, walking me down the aisle. Of course, he didn’t “give” me away. I’ll always belong to Austin too!

I think the most wonderful part of this love story is that we are still so very much in love. A perfect fit. It’s gotten better over the years. I couldn’t have formed a more perfect mate for myself, or a more loving father for my children. I always like to think that, perhaps because I had such a rough beginning in life, God had something special in store for me. And it came in the form of a beautiful, healthy, close little family. I must have done something very, very right. God certainly smiled down on me.

So I heard back on the HCG quant numbers. They are at 38,950. They still aren’t doubling every 72 hours, but are growing. I’ve been feeling nauseous for the past couple of days too, so that’s probably a great sign. I’ve cramped a teensy bit too, which doesn’t really mean anything- it’s just as likely that I’m having growing pains as it is that I’m showing signs of miscarriage. I had cramps in the first trimester with Austin, Bella & Noah.

I have my first OB appointment on the 1st of August, at which point I’ll already be about 11 weeks and almost in the clear.  I’ve never had a loss after the first trimester and the docs seem to think I’m safe if I make it to 12 weeks. So, I guess it’s back to waiting!

7/2: 9984

7/7: 17671

7/9: 22392

7/15: 38950

Grow Baby Grow!

I have so much to share with y’all but I’ve been kind of distracted lately. I did promise to share my hcg quant counts, so here they are:

7/2: 9984

7/7: 17671

7/9: 22392

Apparently the numbers are supposed to double every 72 hours with a healthy, viable pregnancy. They aren’t doing that. So, though the doctor seems relaxed about it, I’m not completely. I know it’s just a waiting game, but it’s frustrating. I’m ok with the outcome either way… I AM! But I just don’t understant why, if this babe isn’t going to happen, WHY does it take so long for the pregnancy to end? I’m not assuming the worst. I’m just sayin. I don’t know what I’m sayin. I guess I’d be happy if I had some nausea. Some vomiting. Some sore boobs. Some doubling numbers. Some something. Throw me a friggin’ bone here!

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In other news, do you remember the comforter drama I had earlier this year? Here’s a recap if you wanted one. Long story short, I lost money/battled with the eBay seller/spit and cursed at PayPal… and… finally… had to humble myself. I went and bought an ugly comforter at WalMart. But it worked and went alright with the colors in my rug and wall pictures. Well guess what!?

I took the fargin’ comforter to the laundry mat the other day. I wash it once a month. Then I bring the wet comforter home and hang it on my clothesline. Anyhooo, I dropped the comforter off, took the kids to McDonalds for lunch, came back to get the comforter an hour later, and… low and behold… some asswipe stole my wet ugly ass WalMart comforter right from out of the machine! Who would do that!? That’s some ghetto shit for ya! I mean, I’m glad it wasn’t expensive or anything. But still. It was MINE, ugly or not. Jeremy said he was glad someone took it because it was so fug. Guess he won’t mind me dippin’ into that paycheck next week to buy something non-fug? I like shopping.

I think I have bad comforter karma though. Wouldn’t you agree?

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I can’t get an Obama bumper sticker for my car anywhere. I could order one online but I’m just too impatient. So I took that big ol’ Expedition to the car wash and cleaned her up. Then I painted on her! So, in case you were wondering… I’m voting for Obama! I get lots of happy beeps and waves while driving my Obama Mama Gas Guzzlin’ Wagon. Who knew a bit of window paint would make people so friendly?

Bad news is? My car broke down at the park (25 miles from my house AND my mechanic) today. So, I’m hoping that the same hoodlum that stole my blanket isn’t Anti-Obama (not that anyone is; how could you not like the guy?). Otherwise I might find my car vandalized on top of having my blanket stolen! I can’t get my car towed until tomorrow and the windows won’t roll up. Makes it kind of easy for a vandal or theif, huh? I just hope they steal the fargin’ thing and drive it into the river. I’ve put more money into that gas guzzlin’ lemon than I’d even want to admit.

Someone send me a Toyota Prius Angel. PLEASE?

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Want some good news though? We went to the Albuquerque Zoo over the weekend and had a BLAST! I’ll have to share more pictures and tales in my next post though, it’s time for me to make dinner. But, Bella got Llama kisses and Nooskers and I got to ride a camel! How awesome is that!? The Llama, Angel, was sweet enough to squeeze! And the look on Noah’s face in that camel picture is PRICELESS! Full of the most intense joy! Maybe I should trade the Expedition for a camel?

More to come… And I promise I won’t be whining in the next post!

Above is an earthship picture I found while searching for images on Google. It’s not at all what I imagine our home looking like (I can do without the space look. I’m a shabby chic girl), but I just love the concept of a home that is self sustainable, and an earthship is just that.

One of my more recent interests is buying some dessert property near my home. It’s a great time to buy and it’s always super cheap to buy dessert property anyways. I want Jeremy and I to have the option of retiring at 55, and that may not be as possible if we’re still chipping away at this 30 year mortgage (28.5 years now–YAYYY!) and IF we don’t have to refi at any point. Our Earthship would be more of a “hobby” of sorts for us– something we could spend weekends building– we could use extra money here and there to do different stages of building, rather than taking out a big loan– we could build it OURSELVES, and out of recycled and cheap materials– we could take 10 years to build it, if need be, because we wouldn’t be in a hurry to live in it– It would be a bonding family project! When it’s all done, whether 5 or 10 years, we could move in and have absolutely NO expenses! No electricity bills, no gas bills, no nada.

If I do it again, I want to build from the ground up– a home that is perfect for us and our needs. That’s why I was excited to hear about the House Plans from houseplansandmore.com. You can find the perfect house plan to suit your needs. An Earthship is what I had in mind for us, but if I were looking for a more traditional home I could find an endless resource for lovely homes through houseplansandmore.com!

Their site claims, “Our goal at House Plans and More is to help you find your dream home plan that incorporates every architectural design feature you need to make your new home highly functional for your lifestyle.” You can search for that perfect home by square footage, number of bed/bath rooms, price, etc., and find a variety of home building resources and helpful tools all in one convenient website organized to make your home plan search simple and easy.

Whether you are interested in house styles such as Southern Plantation, Log home plans, Santa Fe, Rustic, Cabins, or Ranch style homes, you will undoubtedly find what you are looking in Home Plans at houseplansandmore.com. If you aren’t interested in finding house plans, you can also use the site to find shed, garage, and backyard project plans! But you don’t have to take my word for it, waste no time and visit houseplansandmore.com for yourself!