I decided it would be fun to start a new category that I’ll add to now and then, particularly when I am having writer’s block. I have titled it, “Changes” and it will consist of random things I think have changed in my thinking and behaviors over the years. It’s my blawg, y’all, and so it has to have random weirdness from my brain! Here’s the first thing that came to mind when I thought about a change I’ve made:

I have always been a bit neurotic. I was the only child in elementary school who had read books on the Heimlich maneuver or how to do first aid on a rattlesnake bite. I had migraines that I was sure were likely from high blood pressure or a brain tumor, at the age of 7. I was positive that the world would end by some horrible catastrophe by the time I was old enough to wash my own laundry. My mother’s death really emphasized this behavior, as did her Registered Nurse career when she was alive. “Stephanie! Guess what I did today? I got to assist with a spinal tap on a 4 year old,” or “Steph, guess what!? Today I was the nurse who assisted Dr. Landers during surgery to remove a tumor in a young woman’s left breast!” “Steph, I assisted in the delivery of a baby whose mother had male and female genitalia!” (No. I’m not kidding. There is someone out there with two parts and I know all about these parts.)

I couldn’t imagine myself ever reaching the age of 32, her age when she died. Guess what? I’m almost there! Even though the high stress of spending 30 years terrified of everything should have caused a potentially life threatening heart condition or a bleeding ulcer (actually they say these aren’t stressed related now), I am still here! It’s a fucking miracle!

Motherhood changed my neurosis a bit. I don’t worry so much about dying as I do about keeping my children safe. I have to work very hard not to instill every fear I have into my children. Would you like an example?

“Austin? Are you really going to suck the helium out of that balloon!? A-hem. Umm. Nevermind. Suck the helium. It could cause a blood clot in the lungs. But not your lungs. It does lead to cancer in lab rats, but never mind that. I mean, children all over this planet suck helium. Don’t even think twice about shorting your brain of oxygen which might lead to deafness in your right ear or ulcers on your gums. Uhhh. Nevermind Austin. I love you, honey. Suck the helium. Go ahead. Have fun!”

Ok, slight exaggeration. But you get the point. I’m Crazy, y’all! What matters is that we are able to change and grow over the years, right? I went from a 4 foot tall fruity pebble to a 6 foot tall froot loop. Ha!

See, I looked a little on the looney side even then.

Ok, so I made lunch plans with Cary who stood me up on Monday because she forgot her boss was leaving town and she needed to get all of his files ready for the trip. No problem, we rescheduled for today. She e-mails me this morning to tell me she forgot today was early voting day and she needed to reschedule. What!? Duuuude!

Last Friday I went to lunch with another new friend, Heather, who got a call on her cell phone at the beginning of lunch about some work drama, answered the call (which I just wouldn’t do unless the daycare was calling), and spent the first 15 minutes on the phone. She got off the phone, apologized, and then spent the next half of our lunch inhaling and scarfing her food down because she “had something to take care of.” Huh.

So I’ve figured out that there is something wrong with me! I stink or something. Perhaps I have a moustache and it makes people so grossed out that they don’t want to eat with me? Yeah, that’s it. I’m the bearded mommy, only I can’t see the beard; it is invisible to only me. Maybe I stink and I have unsightly facial hair?

Stinky, hairy moms need friends too though, I’ll have you know! Darnit! And those gals don’t mind my paying for lunch despite my smelly hairiness. Hmph.

Noah doesn’t mind. He welcomes me at every lunch hour with a great big smile and 45 minutes of the best cuddling ever! Now that’s better than any lunch break spent with my “Friends.”

“I’m real mad at mom’s friends because I think her invisible beard is very pretty.”

Actually this post is really silly. I’m tired and should go to bed instead of even trying to be funny or creative. Y’all forgive me for it!

Ok, I admit it! I have writer’s block! I am 33 weeks pregnant and my head is full of hormones, baby dreams, and an obnoxious craving for sweet tea. This leaves me nothing particularly interesting to say other than, “Hi. My name is Stephanie. I have contractions constantly. I have a paralyzing desire to suck down gallons of sweet tea. I’m going to have another sugar induced 10 1/2 pound baby. Thank you.” So, in my attempt to share this part of my life with you despite its lack in excitement, today’s pictures:

For those of you keeping up, My chubby ankles are chubby no more! The swelling miraculously disapeared. For now. Except now that I went and bragged, I’ll wake with elephant legs again in the morning. But, I did have a pedicure and I bought some pretty little (If you can call a size 10 “little”) black sequined kitten heels to celebrate. See MY little big foot? Wooo-Hooooo! I have bones and veins again!

This is MY beautiful, sweet, handsome, delicious husband. He makes me big glasses of sweet tea all day long. He loves me!

Here is MY new present! My DImage camera has been acting crazy so Jeremy bought me a new camera today. I’m very excited to play with it. It wasn’t the $1200 camera on my wish list, but this one is very nice for a family camera and should definately do the job. I wanted to have a nice camera for the babe’s birth too.

This is a picture of MY most beautiful fuzzy headed nose picker. Perfection. Even when she is picking boogers.

                                                  ”What!? Gosh! Everyone picks their nose!”